| March 14, 2006 |
| Simple Home Remedies |
Have you ever done something stupid and were embarrassed to go to the doctor for? Do you look for ways to prevent rolling back to sleep after the alarm goes off? Don't you ever wish you could do something about your blood pressure? My boss sent out an email with some simple home remedies. I would use great caution if you want to try any of these.
1) If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2) Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3) Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toliet seat by simply using the sink.
4) For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in you veins. Remember to use a timer.
5) A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6) If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. Then, you will be afraid to cough.
7) Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
-------You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
(If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.)
(If is shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.)
Remember:
* Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
* Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
* If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance. |
posted by Dare @ 8:23 AM  |
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| 1 Comments: |
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ROFL!!!!!
I needed that....thanks!
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Name: Dare
Home: Mabelvale, Arkansas, United States
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ROFL!!!!!
I needed that....thanks!